The Adventures of Ego Boy and Donut Boy
by can'thearyou
Summary: Ego boy and Donut boy are completely different except for one thing, they need each others help. So they form an unlikely alliance on their quest for love. Moliver Lake
1. Chapter 1

**an: so yeah this is the second day of my moliver mania i'm going through. so enjoy**

Chapter 1

"Hurry it up Donut" Lilly called behind her.

Lily, Miley, and Oliver were hiking up a trail. Well Lily and Miley were hiking, Oliver was crawling pitifully behind them. He would've never been on this hiking trip if Miley hadn't convinced him to come.

"Lily can we please take a break" Oliver wheezed.

"We just took a break" Lily said.

"Lily lets just rest he looks so pitiful" Miley said.

"Pathetic is more like it" Lily said rolling her eyes.

"I heard that" Oliver said.

"Good"

"Guys don't start" Miley said rolling her eyes.

Whenever the three of them hung out she always seemed to be the mediator of Lily and Oliver's fights.

"I'm so thirsty" Lily said holding up her empty canteen.

"I'm out too." Miley said.

"You can have some of mine" Oliver said handing Miley his canteen.

"Thanks Oliver" Miley said gratefully.

"Hey!" Lily cried out, "I'm out of water too."

"Whats your point?" Oliver said staring at an oblivious Miley.

"You didn't offer _me_ any of your water" Lily said crossing her arms.

"So?"

"I'm thirsty"

"You said that twice already"

"Give me that" Lily said snatching his canteen when Miley handed it back.

"Hey thats mine" Oliver said grabbing it.

"But I'm thirsty" Lily said pulling it.

"Maybe you shouldn't have drank all of yours" Oliver said pulling harder.

"Guys just sto-"

Miley's sentence was cut off as Oliver's canteen came flying out of his hand and onto Miley's head, drenching her in the remaining water. Lily was failing miserably at trying to contain her laughter.

"M-miley I am so so sorry" Oliver stuttered out.

"It's okay" Miley said, "lets just go okay."

* * *

"Do you guys want some snacks?" Miley said.

"Ooh snacks" Oliver said heading straight for the kitchen.

They had finally arrived back at Miley's house after her and Lily had to practically drag an out of shape Oliver back down the trail with him begging for Miley's forgiveness the whole way.

"I'm gonna go change" Miley said going up to her room.

Oliver stared after her.

"Would you like a towel?" Lily said.

"Why?" Oliver said still staring at the place that Miley once stood.

"To wipe up your drool"

"What!" Oliver said wiping away the nonexistent drool.

"You should tell her you know" Lily said.

"Tell who what?" Oliver said rummaging through the refrigerator.

"Don't play dumb Oken"

"I'm not playing" Oliver said finally emerging from the refrigerator.

"Tell me about it" Lily said rolling her eyes.

Oliver, in an attempt to eat the whole Stewart refrigerator, grabbed everything his hands could hold and grabbed the mustard with his mouth and managed to get it all over his face.

"Lily I really don't know what you're talking about." Oliver said wiping his face which only made it worse.

"Tell Miley you like her" Lily said going into the living room.

Oliver froze.

"I really don't know what you're talking about Lillian." Oliver said.

"Really now?" Lily said crossing her arms, "So you weren't just staring after her like a lost puppy?"

"I was not" Oliver said calmly.

"So what do you call this?" Lily said mocking his face from earlier.

"Since when do you think?" Miley said coming downstairs.

Oliver stared. Again.

"Close your mouth or you'll catch flies" Lily said from the living room.

"Sweet nibblets, I said you guys could have a snack not eat me out of house and home"

"That was all him"

"I was hungry" Oliver said shrugging.

"Looks like it" Miley said wiping some mustard off his face.

"It was an accident" Oliver said.

"_You _were an accident" Lily called from the living room.

"Guys please don't start again" Miley said.

"I'll just clean up" Oliver said.

"Okie doke" Miley said before ruffling his hair and grabbing an apple.

She went into the living room and immediately jumped into some random girl talk with Lily. Oliver decided that this was gonna be his summer. This was gonna be the summer that he makes Miley his girlfriend. He just didn't know how. He was horrible with girls. But he know someone who wasn't.

"I've gotta go" Oliver said heading for the door.

"Why?" Miley said disappointment evident in her voice.

"I've gotta walk my cat" Oliver said walking out.

"Oliver doesn't even have a cat" Lily said

* * *

Oliver stared at the door afraid to knock.

"Oliver?" a voice said when the door opened.

"Hey Jake," Oliver said scratching his neck nervously, "I need your help.

**an: i'm a little iffy about this chapter. but i would love to know what you thought. review.  
**


	2. Chapter 2

**so here is the latest chapter of 'the adventures of ego boy and donut boy'. read and review please**

**disclaimer: i own hannah montana...season 1 and 2 cds**

* * *

Jake opened the front door wider to let Oliver come in. To say that Jake was surprised to see Oliver at his doorstep would be an understatement. Sure they were friendly with each other, but they weren't exactly friends. So what could Oliver possibly want from him?

"Let's go up to my room and talk" Jake said heading upstairs.

Oliver followed behind him and nervously fidgeted with his hands. When they got to his room Jake sat in a chair and gestured for Oliver to sit on his bed.

"So..." Jake said.

"This is a nice room" Oliver said.

"Thank you?"

"No problem."

"Dude," Jake said, "this is getting really awkward"

"Yeah kinda" Oliver chuckled.

"So what was it that you wanted?"

"I kinda want to ask Miley out" Oliver said nervously.

"I think the awkwardness just jumped a few levels" Jake said.

"Sorry"

"Well uh if you want to go out with Miley be my guest" Jake said with a shrug.

"Thank you," Oliver said, "but I wasn't really asking for your permission.

"Then what are you asking?"

"For your help"

"My help?" Jake said confused.

Oliver nodded trying to read Jake's face. All he could see was the same face he knew that he himself always had, confusion. Extreme confusion.

"What could I possibly do to help you?" Jake said.

"I need you help wooing her" Oliver said.

"Wooing?" Jake said with a laugh, "Who says that?"

"I do! So can you help me?"

"Just ask her out"

"It's not that simple" Oliver said, "I do no good with girls"

"Or grammar." Jake said rolling his eyes.

"What?"

"Nothing. Listen, I don't think I would be much help to you."

"Why not?"

"Well you see how well Miley and I worked out right?"

"That doesn't matter," Oliver said, "you're Jake Ryan for crying out loud."

"Well you're Smokin' Oken remember?"

"Yeah I hate to say it but, all that 'smokin' is from the crashing and burning I do with girls."

Jake didn't think he could hold out much longer. He was going to give in and help Oliver. If you saw Oliver you wouldn't be able to turn him down either. He looked so pitiful, he was practically begging for Jake's help. So being the nice guy he was, Jake was going to help Oliver. But that didn't mean he couldn't use this situation to his advantage.

* * *

"Are you sure we have to this now?" Oliver said.

In order to help Oliver, Jake thought he would teach him some valuable lessons in the art of "wooing" a girl. His lessons were foolproof. But Jake wasn't so sure if they were donut proof.

"Yes we have to do it now" Jake sighed.

"Can't we wait until tomorrow?"

"No. The sooner we do this the sooner we both get what we want."

"Yeah about that, are you sure you want to go through this? I mean what you want is like suicide." Oliver said.

The door opened to reveal Miley and Lily.

"Told you I heard voices" Lily said.

"Hey guys" Miley said.

"Hi" Jake and Oliver chorused.

"Back so soon from walking your cat?" Lily said with a smirk.

"Actually my cat died poor Fluffy" Oliver said.

"Right" Lily said rolling her eyes.

"Anyway, why are you two here? Not that we mind or anything." Miley said giving Oliver a quick glance.

"Well we were wondering if you wanted to get some ice cream with us" Jake said.

"That sounds fun. Just give us a minute" Miley said dragging Lily inside.

* * *

"Lily what is he doing here?" Miley said.

"Offering us ice cream?" Lily said with a shrug.

"Lily he can't its gonna make this plan of yours extremely awkward."

"Well I'm sure ice cream could fix the awkwardness" Lily said heading back for the door.

"Lily!" Miley said grabbing her arm, "Help me, I mean you can't mack on a new guy with your ex around."

"Mack?" Lily laughed, "who says that?"

"I do! Now are you going to help or not?"

"Jeez calm down. What do you want me to do?"

"I want you to deflect Jake."

"You want me to de-what him?" Lily said confused.

"Just keep him busy so I can have some time with Oliver" Miley said.

"So you want me to baby-sit ego boy so that you can 'mack' on donut boy?" Lily asked.

"Well when you say it that way it doesn't sound that appealing."

"It's not appealing!" Lily exclaimed, "I'm not doing it"

"Please Lily. Remember when you used to like him?"

"No way. I will not be your deflector person thingy." Lily said crossing her arms, "_And _I only liked him for like five minutes in the eighth grade. Now his ego makes him icky"

"I'll let you have anything from the Hannah closet"

"Fine, but just this once" Lily said walking out the door.

* * *

"Ready to go?" Oliver said when they came out the door.

"Shut it Oken. Let's go Jake." Lily said dragging Jake away.

"Guess we'll meet you there" Jake said winking at Oliver.

"What's up with her?" Oliver said.

"Who knows" Miley said, "Lets go get that ice cream."

"Sounds like a plan."

* * *

**so thats chapter 2. you should expect an update from this either sunday or sometime next week. but updates for my other stores will be posted everyday this week so expect chapter 8 of 'hate that i love you' tomorrow. so i guess its time for your computer to do i magic trick. just press the pretty buton and see what it does.**


	3. Chapter 3

**AN: This chapter has a lot of scene changes,it helps with the flow of the chapter.**

"You look nice today Lily." Jake said.

"Mhm."

Lily and Jake were about a block in front of Oliver and Miley. Lily was trying very hard to ignore Jake, but he wouldn't stop talking to her. You'd think the boy would take a hint.

"What's you favorite TV show?"

"Not Zombie High."

"Oh."

Jake was trying to remember all the things. Oliver had told him about Lily, but he couldn't remember a single thing. So he decided to wing it. He was Jake Ryan, he could do this.

"So," Jake said, "do you like cheese?"

Okay maybe not.

"Cheese?" Lily said, "Did you just ask me if I liked cheese?"

"Yes."

"What kind of question is that?"

Jake just shrugged.

"Listen, I'm not feeling very talkative now so why don't we walk in silence." Lily said.

"Sure."

Maybe Jake wasn't as good at flirting as he thought.

* * *

"So where did you meet up with Jake?" Miley said.

"Uh...on my way home. He was walking his cat. Named Juan."

"Jake has a cat named Juan?" Miley said giving Oliver a look.

"Yea." Oliver said scratching his neck.

"Why do you do that?"

"Do what?"

"Scratch your neck when you talk." Miley said.

"I don't know," Oliver said, "nervous habit I guess."

"What are you nervous about?"

Oliver decided to test out his flirting skills.

"I always get nervous around pretty girls."

"You think I'm pretty?" Miley said quietly.

"I'd be a donut if I didn't."

Miley blushed and smiled, "Thanks Oliver."

"No problem."

"But you're still a donut."

"A cute one?" Oliver pouted.

"Very."

* * *

"...and that's how I one my third Teeny." Jake said.

So the the walking in silence thing wasn't really working out for Lily and Jake. For the past five minutes Jake had been talking non stop about himself. It was a nervous habit of his., and being alone with Lily made him extremely nervous. Lily on the other hand. Was ready to blow her top. If he said one more thing about himself she was going to flip out.

"Do you wanna hear about my fourth Teeny?"

Okay time to flip out.

"No! I don't want to hear about your stupid Teeny!" Lily yelled, "The only thing teeny is your brain!"

"Lily-"

"No' just stop talking!"

"But-"

"Gah! You're such an egotistical jerk!" Lily said storming off.

"So I take it you _don't _want to hear about my Teeny." Jake said following her.

* * *

"Talk. Now." Lily said dragging Miley away when she arrived with Oliver.

"What was that about?" Oliver asked.

"Our walk wasn't that great." Jake said.

"Didn't you talk about the things I told you?"

"No," Jake said, "I kinda forgot everything."

"So what did you talk about?"

"I asked her if she liked cheese."

* * *

"He asked you if you liked _cheese_?" Miley said.

"Weird right?" Lily said.

Miley and Lily were in the girl's restroom discussing, as Lily described it, her horrific walk. Miley was leaning against the wall, while Lily sat up on the sink.

"Then what happened?"

"Then he reminded me why I thought he was icky." Lily said, "He spent five minutes talking non stop about himself, so I told him what I thought about him."

"Oh no," Miley said, "Lily what did you say?"

* * *

"Ouch," Oliver said, "she called you an egotistical jerk?"

Jake nodded, "Yeah, I didn't know Lily could be so mean."

"Welcome to my world."

"I kinda like it." Jake said.

"Right"

"So what happened with you and Miley?" Jake said sitting at a table.

" I _think _I flirted with her."

* * *

"What do you mean you _think _he was flirting?" Lily said.

"I couldn't tell. I mean it seemed like it."

"Leave it to Oken to make something as simple as flirting confusing."

"But he did call me pretty." Miley said with a smile.

"Whoa, that's a big step for Oliver."

"I know. Do you think it means he likes me?"

"I think he does. I don't know."

"What do you know?"

"I know I want some ice cream." Lily said walking out the bathroom.

* * *

"What is with these hour long meetings?" Oliver said when Lily and Miley came to the table.

"We ordered your ice cream already." Jake said.

"I ordered you strawberry, Miley." Oliver said.

"Aw your boyfriend remembered your favorite." Lily whispered.

Miley shot her a glare.

"What did you order me?" Lily said.

"Nothing." Oliver said.

"_I_ ordered you cookies and cream. It's your favorite right?" Jake said.

"Yeah, how did you know?"

"You mentioned it once." Jake shrugged.

"Looks like _your_ boyfriend remembered your favorite." Miley whispered.

"Shut up." Lily grumbled.

In the bathroom. Miley came to the conclusion that Jake liked Lily and that she was completely okay with it. Lily on the other hand, thought that Jake would never go for a girl like her and she was glad for that. Which also led Miley to conclude that deep, _way deep_, down Lily liked Jake too. This only made Lily burst into a fit of hysterics. But now she was starting to think Miley was right about Jake liking her.

* * *

"You want me to walk you home Miley?" Oliver said scratching his neck.

"Sure." she said walking away with him.

"Bye to you guys too." Lily called after them.

"Do you want me to walk you home?" Jake said.

"Not really," Lily said, "but I'm guessing you're not gonna take no for an answer."

"Nope." Jake said smiling.

"Come on then ego boy." Lily said walking away with Jake hot on her tail.

* * *

"I had a great time today Oliver." Miley said.

"Good, me too."

"Maybe the four of us could all hang out again." Miley said.

"Yeah." Oliver said slightly disappointed at the mention of 'four'.

"See ya Oliver." Miley said hugging him.

"Bye Miley."

Oliver watched her walk in with a huge grin on his face.

"Score one for Oken."

* * *

"Did you have a good time today?" Jake said when they reached Lily's door.

"Eh, it was alright." Lily said with a shrug.

"Maybe we could do it again sometime...alone."

"Not likely." Lily said unlocking her front door.

"Bye Lily."

"Whatever." Lily said closing her door in his face.

"She wants me." Jake said walking away.

On the other side of the door Lily leaned against it and groaned, "Aw man, he wants me!"

**AN: Looks like Oliver is doing a lot better than Jake right now. But for how long? Only I know. Review and maybe you could know too?**


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